Breast cancer and dating
Don’t rush, and don’t settle for a knight whose shining armor is made of tinfoil. Jessica Lynne De Cristofaro is a stage 4B Hodgkin’s lymphoma survivor.
After receiving her diagnosis, she found that no real guidebook for people with cancer existed. Chronicling her own cancer journey on her blog, Lymphoma Barbie, she expanded her writings into a book, “Talk Cancer to Me: My Guide to Kicking Cancer’s Booty.” She then went on to found a company called Chemo Kits, which provides cancer patients and survivors with chic chemotherapy “pick-me-up” products to brighten their day.
” Well, just like cancer and treatment, it’s different for everyone. And as I’ve already noted, for me, it was pretty easy. Your mind is almost completely caught up with the fact that the future is so unknown. You’ve lost any physical identity that you once had, and can’t even recognize yourself in the mirror. I just see life very differently than most, which makes dating difficult. Life is just too damn short to settle for anything less, and I think that’s an amazing thing that cancer teaches us.
What wasn’t easy, surprisingly, was dating after my cancer treatments ended. Once that all ends, you’re still wrapping your head around the fact that you were forced to come to terms with your own mortality. You’re also probably dealing with a lot of emotional and physical side effects. I value my time more, I value life more, I value myself more. I know what it’s like to wake up in an ICU and be told that you have cancer in every organ of your body and that you’re going to die. But at the end of the day, this thought was always in the back of my mind: If I were to get sick or die tomorrow, would this be the person I want to be with? After all, I didn’t almost die to be stuck in something that isn’t everything to me.
Sure, some of the men I met would come over to my apartment to eat all my food and leave the toilet seat up. Unless you’re already in a relationship during chemo, you’re just not ready to reenter the world of dating after treatment. I sure wasn’t ready.) It’s been over a year and a half since my last chemo session, and I still don’t know if I’m fully ready. But it’s hard to explain this to someone who’s never been through it. It’s a time to focus on yourself and learn to love yourself again — because if you don’t love yourself, then how could someone else? It’s now been two years since I received my cancer diagnosis.
' or ' When was the last time you were intimate with someone, and what was that like?
Don’t waste your time worrying about whether or not he “cares” that you have or have had cancer.
The bad ones will care, the good ones won’t think twice.
' I’ve found that guys ask really smart, sensitive questions.
Women often ask, ' How did you deal when you lost your hair?