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ENFPs and INFJs both lead with Intuition as their dominant and best-developed learning function.

They both have Feeling as the co-pilot process they used to make decisions.

Then a few years after making this statement, I started actually getting to know one of my ENFP acquaintances.

And now we’re dating (doesn’t that sound like just the sort of coincidence that would happen in a romance story? He does have an intense personality but I’ve done enough work overcoming my social anxiety that doesn’t scare me any more (actually, it’s rather exciting).

Thinking is their tertiary function, which is less well developed but still accessible.

And Sensing is their inferior function, which they have poor access to and which often shows up under stress. Extroverted intuition is very much about exploring the outer world and putting the pieces together.

Once upon a time, I told my sister, “I don’t think I’d ever date an ENFP.” Even though I’d seen lots of people describing ENFP-INFJ as a “perfect” pairing it just didn’t sound like a good fit for me.

I loved having ENFP friends, but the ones I knew were either so intense they made me feel anxious, or so extroverted they wore me out, or too scattered for me to think I wouldn’t eventually get irritated with them in a closer relationship (or all of the above).

While I can’t speak for every ENFP-INFJ relationship (since even people who share a personality type can be very different due to background, culture, etc), I can share a few examples/insights with you.Update 5/28/2018 — My ENFP boyfriend and I broke up about 3 months ago.I’m updating this post with a couple additional points touching on the ways INFJs and ENFPs can experience stress in their relationship.And INFJ’s feeling side is focused outward — they make decisions based primarily on how it will affect other people with a focus on maintaining harmony.An ENFP’s feeling is introverted — they check to see if a decision lines up with their core values with a focus on being authentic.

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