Dating someone who used to be promiscuous Sex chat with no payments

Or what psychodynamic psychotherapists call In other words, for me, what "drives" us sexually or otherwise is a mixture of nature and nurture, as well as familial, societal or cultural influences. For Rollo May, this motivational "drive" of which we are speaking is what he termed the is capable of driving us toward destructive and/or creative activity.

But I consider it a gross oversimplification to reduce motivation in the case of sexual promiscuity to pure biology. Particularly to the extent it remains unconscious and, therefore, unintegrated into and disconnected from the conscious personality.

Though I would argue that psychologically, sociologically and biologically, sex holds a significantly different meaning for men and women.

Sigmund Freud, the first "psychodynamic" theorist more than a century ago, was very clear that we live in a sexually repressed society.

I have no doubt that different temperaments, sometimes congenital, can include different, e.g., more or less aggressive or powerful libidinal urgings.

But here we get into the nature of a so-called "drive." As a clinical psychologist, I think of "drive" as a combination of both biological (endogenous or intrinsic) libidinal energy, intrapsychic structure (including complexes), and external (exogenous or extrinsic) motivation.

You call this the "brutal truth." Rollo May's psychology never shied away from, distorted or denied the tragic and brutal truth about human existence.

Yet, you may be right that marriage and monogamy simply did not suit her personality nor her voracious appetite for sex. You contend Rollo May prejudically believed so, that he was someone who found monogamy meaningful and sexual promiscuity shallow, superficial and unfulfilling. I agree that people derive meaning in life in different ways. (See, for example, Bella De Paulo's blog on being single here at .) Marriage or monogamy is no more inherently meaningful (or meaningless) than promiscuity, singlehood or celibacy for that matter.

So much so that you note the high number of abortions (estimated to be as many as 17) she purportedly underwent.

And her sexual behavior was certainly unconventional in her day and socially frowned upon.

(See, for example, the diagnostic criterion of impulsive behaviors like reckless sex in Borderline Personality Disorder and often dangerously heightened sexual drive and behavior in the manic phase of Bipolar Disorder.) Of course, some experimental promiscuity during adolescence and young adulthood is typical in our culture, and considered by most to be developmentally normal rather than pathological.

Having said that, it is easy for men to be accused of imposing a double standard when it comes to female sexuality: It's fine for men to be sexually promiscuous. Such sexual activity is often culturally encouraged and admired.

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