The purity issue isn’t so much that you want to be sexual, it is more tied in to your need and desire to feel loved.
Solution: Come up with a list of ways of how you can both express love and affection to each other in nonphysical ways. Verbalize the Mistakes Don’t be afraid to call a “timeout.” What I mean by “timeout” is that once a boundary has been crossed, you must verbalize it right away to one another and call it what it was: wrong and dishonoring.
“It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality” (1 Thessalonians 4:3). You can enjoy fun, positive friendships with people of the opposite sex and be involved in all sorts of activities without coupling up with one person. God says, “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers . When we put ourselves in an ungodly atmosphere with ungodly people we are influenced toward ungodliness.
If you do choose to date, the following guidelines can help you maintain a walk with God and guard your purity. “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character’” (I Corinthians ). Realize your date is your brother or sister in Christ—not your “lover.” “Treat older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity” (1 Timothy 5:2).
This perspective shift was a game changer for my wife and me in our dating relationship.
Once we got the revelation and agreed on the vision that “I show that I love and care about you more when I deny my flesh and chose to honor your body and the Lord” it took the physical pressure off the relationship.
The next time that dog is let out where do you think he is going… After a mess up, silence is the greatest enemy to future victory.
So don’t forget to call a timeout, get loud in the huddle, and talk strategy of how to make sure it doesn’t happen again.
Although we managed to save sex until our wedding night, it was all the “not so bad” stuff that would lead us to tears and our knees before the Lord, asking for forgiveness and a fresh start.I’ve learned that it’s actually not a purity focus that you and your boyfriend/girlfriend need the most to “hold your horses.” It’s not, “Lord, help me be pure,” but instead, “Lord, help me worship and honor you with my body”.I think sometimes couples can be so focused and paranoid on staying pure that they draw too much attention to purity, which actually makes it easier for them to stumble.We found a way to keep our hands off each other and honor God and each other with our bodies.Talk about a freedom and holy intimacy that brought to our relationship.