Recovering after dating a borderline
This is not helpful and certainly not an easy quality to deal with in someone you share your life with, but the key to it working is understanding why the person does the things they do so you can work together to help them.You wouldn’t ask a person with a freshly broken leg to climb three flights of stairs, and in the same way, you shouldn’t assume a person with BPD would just be able to handle certain aspects of a relationship.If you fall for someone with BPD then I won’t lie, you will be in for an experience you may not have had before.But if you learn about the illness, its symptoms and discuss with your partner, you will be able to find healthy ways of dealing with them and I promise you it will be worth it.Some people pull away for space, which is possibly the hardest thing for us to take.
If you communicate clearly and honestly then you get rid of that fear of the unknown, the fear that you’ll disappear, and the fear they have of not being good enough.
One of the most persistent myths about borderline personality disorder (BPD) is that it can't be treated. Or are there more useful ways to think about recovery?
In fact, BPD can respond well to evidence-based treatments, and those treatments are improving. Researchers from the University of Wollongong looked at how recovery is currently defined, and how thinking about it differently could help improve treatments and outcomes for people experiencing BPD.
It’s only ever done in a misguided attempt to stop the terrible feelings that occur when our illness is triggered by certain factors.
It breaks our heart when we feel our behaviour has pushed you away, and sometimes we don’t have the emotional intelligence to fix it, which is where you need to help us.